The following appeared on the Weekly Newsletter of a Catholic parish! FOR THOSE WHO MAY ASK But Father what do you do all day? Written by a parish priest who has since - perhaps understandably! – retired Leader of people, wisest of guides; diplomat, elder, who never takes sides. Inspirer, Confessor, forgiver of sins; caretaker, cleaner and emptier of bins. Welcome baptizer of infants in arms; counter of candles and filler of forms, Father and teacher, chaplain to schools; chairman of governors, maker of rules. Guide of the juniors, infants and staff with time to be serious, time for a laugh. Counselor, preacher, entertainer at times; ever available till midnight chimes, Parish accountant and administrator; typist and banker, and news duplicator. Signer of mass cards, reference composer, certificate writer and passport endorser. Digger of gardens, inspector of drains, checker of roofs every time that it rains. Re designer of churches, to fill empty pews, re-glazier of windows, repairer of loos. Visitor, caller, knocker on doors, target of gossips and cadgers and bores. Chaplain to hospital, long or short stay, ‘please don’t forget, my Mum’s in for the day’. the doctors and’ nurses all merit a call, smile kindly at everyone - keep on the ball, Sayer of masses and liturgy leader, celebrant, sacristan, cantor and reader. Marshal of servers, collectors and choir; of hymn books and papers - both seller and buyer. President of Eucharist, calm as you like - “but did I remember to switch on the mic! Celebrant of masses, devotions and prayers, patient receiver of everyone’s cares. Marriage encounter and parish renewal; Journeys of Faith and liturgical jewels. Shepherd to prayer groups, prophet and pastor; spiritual director and guru and master. Front line evangelist, missioner, catalyst; guardian of faith and converter and catechist, Supporter of cafod and Christian Aid, with boxes and envelopes of all shapes and shades, Friend of the Anglicans, Methodists, Jews, Muslims and Buddhists - and everyone’s views. Joint schemes and services, unity prayers, civic occasions and parties and fayers. Blesser of Rosaries, of houses and homes, the power and the glory still stretching from Rome. Help of the sick and anoint-er and healer; support for the dying and final appealer, Conductor of funerals, comfort of mourners, called to give solace to even the scorners. By bingo enthusiasts and drinkers, he’s seen, as the beginning and end of the social life scene. Drawer of Raffles, Jumble Sales, Stalls - now rushing to Court to re-license the Hall. Minister of marriage, the guide of young love, adviser of couples who need help from above. Provider of insight into all life connubial; collector of forms for the marriage tribunal. Man of prayer and reflection, of study and thought, but still finding time for the news and the sport. Looker after of the parish next door, when their priest is sick and down on all fours, worries about wedding preparation and whether he has the right information. Something for everyone you might exclaim, but when things go wrong who is it they blame? Why isn’t Father available –  he’s never there when I want him!